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‘A Louisville man is facing public intoxication charges after police said they found him walking down South Third Street with an 18-inch sex toy in his pants. According to arrest records, a Louisville Metro Police officer saw Alen Spahic, 26, walking with a large bulge coming from the waistband of his pants around 1:20 a.m. Friday. The officer said Spahic was wearing sunglasses and had his hands wrapped tightly around his body, as if he was holding a large object in his jacket. According to arrest records, the officer patted Spahic down for weapons and found an 18-inch sex toy and lubricants. Police said Spahic was shouting obscenities, said that everyone was going to die and that he was a wolverine. Police also said Spahic had “pinpoint pupils.” According to arrest records, the officer felt that Spahic was a danger to himself and the public. Spahic is charged with public intoxication and second-degree disorderly conduct’ – MSNBC


And a short Headline to finish :

‘Armless Pianist Wins China’s Got Talent’ – Metro.


from football365.com/mediawatch

Frisky Poltergeist

‘For once, it’s not crocodiles that are traumatising residents of the Top End … it’s randy poltergeists. A Northern Territory woman is reportedly adamant she was attacked while she slept – by a “horny ghost”. Jennifer Mills-Young of Durack, near Darwin, said a ghost she calls Kevin tried to drag her out of her bed. She told her local newspaper, The Northern Territory News, that during her ordeal she was stern with Kevin – she told him he was not welcome in her bed and that he should leave and close the door behind him. Her story prompted the headline “Horny ghost Kev spooks housewife”

“I was asleep …. [and] I woke up when someone grabbed my wrist. I thought, ‘Hmmm, hubby wants a bit of romance’, when I suddenly remembered he wasn’t even at home. The moment I opened my eyes, the grip was gone and the room was empty. I yelled at Kevin that he was not welcome in my bedroom and that he couldn’t come into bed with me. I told him to f— off and to close the door behind him. A moment later I saw how the bedroom door was closed. I jumped up and locked it – not that it makes much of a difference when you’re dealing with a ghost” – Ms Mills-Young recounts the saucy details.

– Sydney Morning Herald.


Monkey Business

Delhi authorities have deployed a contingent of large black-faced langur monkeys at the Commonwealth Games venues to scare away smaller simians. At least 10 langurs have been on duty outside some of the venues in the Indian capital, reports say. Delhi civic authorities have 28 langurs and 10 more have been brought in from the neighbouring Rajasthan state’ – BBC News


Bank Robber’s Miscalculation

‘Wannabe bank-robbers in Germany were forced to leave empty-handed after a slight misjudgement over the amount of explosives needed meant they destroyed the whole bank – except for the thing with the money inside. The bank destruction took place in the northeastern German village of Malliss (which, if it only got a little bigger, would be a town called Malliss).

‘The bank was reduced to a pile of rubble and its roof completely obliterated by the night-time explosion, while cars and buildings up to 100 metres away were damaged. However, in the ruins of the bank, there was one thing left completely intact: the cash machine. ‘The explosion was so big, they had to run away without the money,’ said local police spokesman Niels Borgmann. ‘Something evidently didn’t work the way the robbers wanted it to,’ he added with masterful understatement. Nobody is thought to have been injured in the blast. Police are still hunting for the culprits’ – Metro.

from http://football365.com/mediawatch/0,17033,8749_6174783,00.html

Ninja Ambush!

‘Three muggers in Australia got the fright of their lives when their attack was interrupted by five black-clad ninja warriors. The thieves were assaulting a German medical exchange student in Sydney, but the alleyway where they struck was next to a school for ninja warriors. One of the pupils raised the alarm after noticing the attack. Police say they have arrested two men and charged them with robbery, and are still looking for a third suspect. “We just ran outside and started running at them, yelling and everything,” said ninja master Kaylan Soto who instructed his students to take action. “These guys have turned around and seen five ninjas in black ninja uniforms running towards them. They just bolted.” The victim suffered minor injuries, and the men stole his mobile phone and iPod, according to police. Mr Soto said the man could have escaped the assault with some training in ninjitsu – a Japanese martial art. As for the attackers, “They just picked the wrong spot,” he added.


McRapper with Lies

Non-Football Story Of The Day
‘A teenager charged with disorderly conduct after he and some friends rapped their order at a McDonald’s drive-thru in Utah has been found not guilty. Spenser Dauwalder was cited for disorderly conduct in October last year, after he and his friends imitated a rap from a popular YouTube video that begins ‘I need a double cheeseburger and hold the lettuce.’ Fourth District Judge Thomas Low delivered the Not Guilty verdict on Tuesday in American Fork, about 30 miles south of Salt Lake City. Dauwalder had pleaded not guilty and pledged to fight the citation….Kasey Wright, who represented the city, said that although Dauwalder wasn’t the one rapping, he was complicit in what was going on. He added that the case was never about the rapping, but it was about disruption of the business and alleged threatening behavior toward a restaurant employee. But Wright said the judge ultimately found the activity did not rise to the level of disorderly conduct. ‘We were disappointed in the ruling,’ Wright said’ – Metro.