How Romantic…

‘A 99-year-old Italian man and his wife of 77 years are to become the world’s oldest couple to divorce after his 96-year-old wife had an affair 70 years ago. The husband, identified by lawyers in the case as Antonio C, found out about the adultery when he was looking through an old chest of just before Christmas. He immediately asked his wife, who is identified as Rosa C, for a divorce as he was so upset over the betrayal. ‘Court papers released in Rome this week revealed that she sent letters to her lover during a secret affair in the 1940s. The couple have five children, a dozen grandchildren and one great-grand child, but the discovery proved to be the last straw for the marriage, which reportedly ran into trouble ten years ago. Lawyer Anna Orecchioni said: ‘The husband decided to file for divorce after finding the love letters. He felt betrayed and unable to carry on with the marriage which has lasted 77 years.’ – Metro.


Hot Nuts

‘A man ran naked for 5km to the safety of a police station after his girlfriend splashed boiling water on his private parts. Harian Metro, quoting sources, said the man had told his 24-year-old girlfriend the night before that he wanted to end their relationship. They had initially booked into a hotel in Kuala Lumpur that Saturday night. An argument broke out between them when the man announced that their relationship was over.

“She returned to the hotel the next morning, bringing a bag containing among others, three knives, two pairs of scissors, a hammer and a brick,” a source said. She started to boil water to prepare breakfast. However, the couple argued again and “the suspect took the boiling water and splashed it on the abdomen and private parts of the boyfriend.” Despite the pain, the man managed to run to the Kota Damansara police station and was rushed to Sungai Buloh Hospital for treatment. Petaling Jaya Deputy OCPD Supt Meor Hamdan Meor Mohamad confirmed that a woman had been detained for investigations’ – The

Even Worse Than Taking ‘Half’!

‘A Frenchman has been ordered to pay his ex-wife £8,500 in damages for failing to have enough sex with her during their marriage. The 51-year-old man was fined under article 215 of France’s civil code, which states married couples must agree to a “shared communal life”. A judge has now ruled that this law implies that “sexual relations must form part of a marriage”. The rare legal decision came after the wife filed for divorce two years ago, blaming the break-up on her husband’s lack of activity in the bedroom. A judge in Nice, southern France, then granted the divorce and ruled the husband named only as Jean-Louis B. was solely responsible for the split. But the 47-year-old ex-wife then took him back to court demanding 10,000 euros in compensation for “lack of sex over 21 years of marriage”.

‘The ex-husband claimed “tiredness and health problems” had prevented him from being more attentive between the sheets. But a judge in the south of France’s highest court in Aix-en-Provence ruled: “A sexual relationship between husband and wife is the expression of affection they have for each other, and in this case it was absent. By getting married, couples agree to sharing their life and this clearly implies they will have sex with each other” – The Daily Telegraph.

Wooffan SS

Magneto Lives!

‘A six-year-old Croatian boy astounds his family and friends with his ‘magnetic’ body. Ivan Stoiljkovic is reportedly able to stick metallic objects such as spoons, mobile phones and even frying pans to his body.And his family, who live in a village near Koprivnica, say he can carry up to 25kg of metal stuck to his torso at a time’ – Orange News

Man ‘high on bath salts’ arrested in bra, panties, accused of stabbing goat –

‘A US man found wearing women’s underwear and standing over a goat’s carcass told West Virginia police he was high on bath salts. Mark L Thompson of Alum Creek was arrested at his home on Monday. A criminal complaint in Kanawha County Magistrate Court charges the 19-year-old with cruelty to animals. Sheriff’s Deputy JS Shackelford says witnesses reported Mr Thompson standing near a neighbour’s pygmy goat in a bedroom. He was wearing a bra and female underwear. The goat had at least one stab wound. Corporal Sean Snuffer says Mr Thompson indicated he had been high and “wasn’t in his right mind”. Mr Thompson was held on $50,000 bond yesterday at the South Central Regional Jail. Jail records didn’t indicate whether he had a lawyer and no listed phone number was available’

Pedestrian Crossing Prank

‘Red-faced traffic bosses are investigating how pranksters altered a set of pedestrian lights to show a couple making love whenever they turned green. The lights – in Nimwegen, Holland – literally stopped the traffic when passers by stopped to gawp at them during rush hour. One officer said: ‘People kept pressing the button to see the couple having sex and of course every time they did, the traffic had to stop suddenly. We had quite a lot of rear end shunts from drivers who were too distracted.’ Transport officials are investigating how computer hackers managed to get into the town’s traffic light system to manipulate the image. A Town Hall spokesman said: ‘We are looking at who had access and opportunity’ – Metro.